Unofficial CPC Election Song

Well it looks like we are going to have an election in Canada, on that note, here's my unofficial election song for the Conservative Party of Canada, thanks to the inspirational Michael Ignatieff and with apologies to Mick and the boys:

Paint It Black

I see a red door and I want it painted black

No Liberals anymore I won’t ever vote them back

I see the Grits walk by dressed in their election clothes

I have to turn my head until my darkness goes

I see a line of buses and they're all painted rouge

With our votes we’ll all get rid of Iggy the stooge

I see people turn their heads and quickly look away

We’re no longer the suckers born each and every day

I look inside myself and see my heart is black

I see my red door and must have it painted black

Maybe then Iggy will fade away and not have to face the facts

It's not easy facin' up when your whole world is black

No more will my green go to the Red machine

Something Iggy could never have foreseen

If I look hard enough into the settin' sun

Conservatives will laugh with me before the countin' comes

I see a red door and I want it painted black

No Liberals anymore I won’t ever vote them back

I see the Grits walk by dressed in their election clothes

I have to turn my head until my darkness goes

Hmm, hmm, hmm,...

I wanna see it tainted, tainted black

Black as night, black as coal

I wanna see Iggy blotted out from the house

I wanna see it tainted, tainted, tainted, tainted black

Yeah!Hmm, hmm, hmm,...

Lyrics 2011 By Al the Fish

Mr. Bombastic vs Mr. Comcastic

Last night I tuned into the twitter universe and saw tweets about Keith Olbermann leaving MSNBC. I quickly checked my calendar to make sure it wasn't April 1st. Unlike his 2 day suspension over his contributions to Democratic candidates in the mid-term elections, this looks like it is a permanent severing of his ties with MSNBC.

I have to admit, when Keith Olbermann was a talking head on ESPN's Sportscenter, I enjoyed his style, and banter with long term on air partner Dan Patrick. Together they made Sportscenter a highlight of my TV viewing, bouncing jokes off each other and using their signature lines when describing highlights.

After reading many sources, it is still not clear if Olbermann was fired by the new owners of MSNBC, Comcast ("From way downtown, BANG!") or if this was a pre-emptive strike ("They're not going to get him") by Olbermann who saw his days ("We're all day to day") at MSNBC numbered.

Regardless of how he left MSNBC, it was not likely under very friendly circumstances, his past departures from ESPN; FOX Sports; MSNBC; and ESPN again were noted for his bridge burning style. I’ve always wondered if his departure from FOX Sports fuelled his rage against FOX NEWS when he was on MSNBC. Does a bear crap in the woods?

So what next for the Olbermann? Is there a network left willing to take a chance on him? Viacom and CBS under Sumner Redstone perhaps? He could then be moved between CBS; Comedy Central; and Spike like a piece of furniture, that wobbly uncomfortable wooden chair that nobody wants to sit on. He could replace Andy Rooney on 60 Minutes for the closing rant. On Comedy Central, he could probably fake the news as easily as Stewart and Colbert. And Spike could have a new show entitled “When will Keith Olbermann’s Head Explode?”, where contestants guess how long it will take Olbermann to transform from smiling talking head to fire spewing demon when told a good news story about a conservative. Viacom also has MTV as one of its brands, maybe Olbermann could use a vacation and hang with the Jersey Shore gang for a while. I’d pay to see the Keither and Snooki bitch slapping each other after a weekend bender.

But I think the real future for Olbermann will be as a politician. It is time for him to put his big money (his current contract with MSNBC is reported as resulting in a $14 million buyout with his firing/resignation) where his big mouth is. No more piddling donations on the sly to your Democratic Party friends (which resulted in the November 2010 2 day suspension brouhaha,) I want to see you run as a Democratic candidate for the House of Representatives or Senate. If you really think Scott Brown, is “an irresponsible, homophobic, racist, reactionary, ex-nude model, tea-bagging supporter of violence against women and against politicians with whom he disagrees” then why don’t you move to Massachusetts and run against him? Simple is a simple does, run Forest run! Forest Chump for Senate!